Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Lists

Here I will list things endlessly and endlessly...

Top things I'm sick of:

The Simpsons
Beyonce
Iraq
Tsunami
Snow
Lunch
Seacrest out
High def
The Super Bowl
The Super Bowl commercials
all other commercials
the entire marketing industry
business
loans
mortgages
condos
apartments
roomates
furniture
people singing really bad songs really badly
playstation2
dvds
menus
computers
the internet
other people mostly
reality television
the evening news
talkshows
movies
radio talk show hosts
the fcc
dubya
elections
ballots
hanging chads
guys named chad
girls named candice
paula abdul
dan rather
top 40 music
rolling stone
the rolling stones
the beatles
elvis
las vegas
texas hold'em
espn
fat people in general
the fast food industry
chain restaurants
gas stations
and acceptance speeches.

The Beginning

So I'm blogging, I guess. So is this a stream of conscience type deal? I guess I'll run with that even though it certainly won't prove excitement. I honestly have no idea what I'm doing here, at this site on the expanse of internetdom. I can't read other blogs either. I find them mostly boring, much to the chagrin of a would be reader of mine. Are other people actually reading this?

Some reason tells me not. Something tells me that I'm alone, even in this great vastness of blogger.com. Fine by me as that is usually the case. Background info then, I suppose, would be in order. I'm sitting here in my cubicle, noticeably decked out in the most boring unassuming gray that white and black could create, writing this stream of tepid trite. I guess now that the introductory stuff is out of the way lets head over to current events!

Wow, here I am at paragraph three, also known as the hip hop section of our broadcast. Is anyone else sick of Beyonce? Is it just me? Was it really necessary for her to sing three different times the other night at the Oscars? What was she trying to prove? Was she even in a movie this year? At least JLo would of had something to do with movies, although we're still not sure if Gigli actually counts. I can't decide if I find Beyonce attractive, similar to the reaction I used to have with Madonna. Oh well, subjects like these are best left unanalyzed.

Ah the Oscars, a more worthless night of television I can't recall. Since when do we now have to sit through a mindless hour of Barbera Walters interviewing has-beens and never-will-bes before the awards show? How is this relevant? Apparently Star Jones is the new, um, star of the red carpet. I actually never could see the carpet during the broadcast, Star took up most of the camara room. I'm not even sure there was a red carpet, just the glare coming off her dress. Chris Rock was terrible by the way, also, Jamie Foxx isn't really talented, he's just fooling everybody.

Okay, I've certainly had enough of that. This blog is really bad, I'm not going to save it. Well, maybe just for a moment. Here, for a subtle break in the action, is my top 5 current television shows, partly because I've nothing else to fill this space and partly because I want to try out the listing technique:
  1. Carnivale - Great show on HBO, almost like a new movie every week. I was confused a few episodes ago though, I thought that Sofie and Ben were brother and sister? Thus rendering their love scene somewhat, err, high on the creepy scale. Supposidly the story goes that the spawn of the devil is born on incest or something like that, so maybe that is what happened here. That would also somewhat explain why it started to rain at her, err, moment of climax. See, I told you, great show.
  2. Lost - For some reason I've grown addicted to this fairly mundane and often idiotic show. I mean Polar Bears? Get real. But hey, we all get suckered in at some point. For me it was when what's her name cleaned up in the ocean. Just a fan.
  3. 24 - Yeah Yeah, some say it has jumped the shark but for some reason I still tune in each week. It definitely has taken a hit at least with Cuthbert gone from the cast. I missed that weekly glimpse although she really pissed me off last season with that haircut. And the phony job at CTU. And the loser boyfriends. Okay, I'm not really upset she's gone, who can forget the mountain lion.
  4. The OC - Yes, you read it right. I've nothing else in my defense.
  5. House MD - A new show on Fox that somehow has sucked me in even though I usually hate medical dramas. They bore me with all the doctor talk and close up open heart surgery scenes. I mean really, should I be taking notes for the next time my friend has a massive coronary? However this show does a decent job of staying away from these scenes, plus the head doctor guy seems like a nutjob, which is always entertaining. My only complaint is that every test they run on patients end up telling them nothing. Its getting a little redudent and I think they've aired three episodes.
Well that was my first list, not bad? Got a little wordy in there, oh well this is my first time. Check back soon where I will continue my masterful list making skills with wait, hold for it, wait for it, my top ten albums of 2004. Yeah I know, two months late...